A Florida Man...

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billy.pilgrim
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Re: A Florida Cop...

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Vrede too wrote:
Thu Mar 07, 2019 6:33 pm
Today We Have Justice' — Florida Police Officer Convicted In 2015 Shooting

A jury in West Palm Beach, Fla., has convicted a former police officer in the shooting death of a black motorist. It's the first time in 30 years that an on-duty police officer in Florida has been convicted in a shooting....
30 years. Even an LEO fanboy should be able to admit that ain't right. How many have the Florida cops killed in that time?

But he was only a brown Asian type. We ain't about to convict a white guy.
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Vrede too
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Re: A Florida Cop...

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billy.pilgrim wrote:
Thu Mar 07, 2019 6:37 pm
But he was only a brown Asian type. We ain't about to convict a white guy.
Ah, that explains it. Also, no conviction if the victim didn't happen to be on the phone. The recording proved the cop a liar.
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GoCubsGo
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Re: A Texas Man...named Alex Jones

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Eamus Catuli~AC 000000 000101 010202 020303 010304 020405....Ahhhh, forget it, it's gonna be a while.

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Vrede too
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Re: A Florida Man...

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Colton Fears Sentenced to Five Years in Prison

A Houston man has been sentenced to five years in prison in Florida for his role in an armed confrontation with protesters following a speaking engagement by Richard Spencer on Oct. 19, 2017.

Police arrested Colton Fears, his brother William Fears and Tyler TenBrink after Spencer’s ill-received speech on the University of Florida campus. According to police reports, the Fears brothers began yelling praises of Adolf Hitler and throwing up Nazi salutes from the window of their Jeep, which drew the attention of nearby protesters. The brothers then urged TenBrink to shoot the protesters shouting, “I’m going to fucking kill you,” “kill them” and “shoot them.”

TenBrink got out of the vehicle and fired at the protesters once, missing the group. TenBrink then hopped back in the Jeep and the three fled the scene with Colton Fears at the wheel, The Gainesville Sun reported. The three were arrested later that evening.

At his sentencing Monday, Colton Fears disavowed the white supremacist views he shared with his brother and TenBrink. Fears also apologized to the victims as well as the city.

“I am embarrassed to be entangled in your court system, your honor,” Fears said. “I wish I would have never came to Gainesville. Everything that happened that day is a regret. This has destroyed my life. It’s time to put this in my past and move forward.”

Fears pleaded guilty to the charge of accessory after the fact to attempted first degree murder last August, agreeing to testify against TenBrink.

Tenbrink was sentenced Feb. 27 to 15 years in prison for aggravated assault with a deadly weapon and possession of a firearm by a convicted felon. Tenbrink was quoted by The Washington Post on his dedication to the “14 words,” a popular white supremacist slogan. Charges were dropped against William Fears, who was extradited to Texas to stand trial for unrelated charges there.

Both Fears brothers attended the “Unite the Right” rally in Virginia earlier that same year. William was filmed yelling: “Shoot! Fire the first shot of the race war!” Colton was spotted marching with a “sonnenrad” shield, a symbol favored by the SS and replicated on the cover of the New Zealand shooter’s “The Great Replacement” manifesto and on his body armor.

Alachua County Circuit Judge James Colaw tacked three years onto the minimum two-year sentence, noting that Fears played a role in a crime that was “intended to scare, threaten or harm.”

Colton Fears was the last defendant sentenced for his part in the confrontation with protesters after Spencer’s speech.
:---P :---P
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Vrede too
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Re: A Florida Man...

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Why 'Florida Man' is a thing: Weirdness in other states goes unnoticed

So the new thing is to Google "Florida Man" and your birthday, and see which nutty story comes up.
Me:
Florida man finds iguana in drain beneath clogged toilet

A Florida man who noticed the toilet in his family's warehouse wasn't flushing well discovered the cause -- an iguana in the drain pipe.

Oscar Tabares said he was using the bathroom last week at his family's warehouse in Medley when he noticed the commode wasn't flushing well and water was leaking out from under the bowl.

Tabares used a plunger to attempt to unclog the toilet, but he was unsuccessful. He said he enlisted the help of family members to remove the toilet so he could look down into the train.

Tabares said he looked into the drain pipe and saw the head of an iguana looking back at him.

A video captured by Tabares shows his uncle using a piece of rope tied to a piece of wood to fish the iguana out of the drain.

Tabares said his uncle used the makeshift leash to walk the iguana out behind the warehouse, where the creature was set free.
I hate when that happens. Or:

Florida Man Performs Striptease for Couple in Japanese Restaurant; Threatens to Fight Husband When He Tells Him They Didn’t Order It

Comments:
"Hi folks, who ordered the BEEF?"[disrobes]
If they just could have worked a gator in somehow, this story would have everything. I need to make a Floridaman bingo card
Our manager is very dedicated to his side jobs.
It's complimentary with the meal. They seem a bit ungrateful.
I'm always in the wrong place at the wrong time. I would've given him a dollar
I hate when that happens, too. Bet that's the last time they order the strip steak. Back to the original article:
... Florida definitely has more than its share of oddballs, bumbling would-be criminals and drunken buffoons. But I hail from Pennsylvania, and let me tell you, the Keystone State is no slouch in this regard.

So why is "Florida Man" a thing, but "Pennsylvania Man" isn't?
Because O Really left Pennsylvania?
Three words: public records laws.

Florida has one of the most robust public records laws in the nation. Documents, photos, even videos created by a public agency are readily available — with some notable exceptions (and here I'm thinking of the video of New England Patriots' owner Robert Kraft in that massage parlor).

Police agencies routinely make all this available to the news media....

Then again, on Feb. 25 came what could be my favorite recent Florida Man story, out of Palm Beach County: "Florida Man Steals $33,000 Worth of Rare Coins, Cashes Them in CoinStar Machine for $29.30."

If Feb. 25 is your birthday — I declare you the winner.
I think Florida Man would win, regardless.
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neoplacebo
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Re: A Florida Man...

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It's probably a combination of the heat and humidity and the low altitude that results in the increase of heat and a lack of humility and a surplus of low attitude. Florida is ideal for any situation that has a potential to rapidly evolve into some melodramatic disaster. The Sunshine State; let it all hang out. I wouldn't be surprised to learn that it's a common sight for humans to drag their asses across manicured lawns like dogs with worms.

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O Really
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Re: A Florida Man...

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neoplacebo wrote:
Sun Mar 31, 2019 6:10 pm
I wouldn't be surprised to learn that it's a common sight for humans to drag their asses across manicured lawns like dogs with worms.
What - is there something unusual about that? You saying they don't do that in Tennessee?

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neoplacebo
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Re: A Florida Man...

Unread post by neoplacebo »

O Really wrote:
Sun Mar 31, 2019 6:31 pm
neoplacebo wrote:
Sun Mar 31, 2019 6:10 pm
I wouldn't be surprised to learn that it's a common sight for humans to drag their asses across manicured lawns like dogs with worms.
What - is there something unusual about that? You saying they don't do that in Tennessee?
:lol: no, I did not say that at all. I expect the ass draggers up here are concentrated in Nashville or Memphis. Since being back here I've not noticed any in these parts but I tend to be rather reclusive so it's possible that one or two may have scooted by unnoticed. I will be more observant from now on.

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Vrede too
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Re: A Florida Man...

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neoplacebo wrote:
Sun Mar 31, 2019 8:28 pm
O Really wrote:
Sun Mar 31, 2019 6:31 pm
neoplacebo wrote:
Sun Mar 31, 2019 6:10 pm
I wouldn't be surprised to learn that it's a common sight for humans to drag their asses across manicured lawns like dogs with worms.
What - is there something unusual about that? You saying they don't do that in Tennessee?
:lol: no, I did not say that at all. I expect the ass draggers up here are concentrated in Nashville or Memphis. Since being back here I've not noticed any in these parts but I tend to be rather reclusive so it's possible that one or two may have scooted by unnoticed. I will be more observant from now on.
Does Tennessee have chiggers? If not, Florida Man is still tougher/crazier.
A clown with a flamethrower still has a flamethrower.
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neoplacebo
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Re: A Florida Man...

Unread post by neoplacebo »

Vrede too wrote:
Sun Mar 31, 2019 10:24 pm
neoplacebo wrote:
Sun Mar 31, 2019 8:28 pm
O Really wrote:
Sun Mar 31, 2019 6:31 pm
neoplacebo wrote:
Sun Mar 31, 2019 6:10 pm
I wouldn't be surprised to learn that it's a common sight for humans to drag their asses across manicured lawns like dogs with worms.
What - is there something unusual about that? You saying they don't do that in Tennessee?
:lol: no, I did not say that at all. I expect the ass draggers up here are concentrated in Nashville or Memphis. Since being back here I've not noticed any in these parts but I tend to be rather reclusive so it's possible that one or two may have scooted by unnoticed. I will be more observant from now on.
Does Tennessee have chiggers? If not, Florida Man is still tougher/crazier.
Chiggers? You bet'cha. We also have fleas, ticks, and assorted vermin large and small. I have managed to teach one small cat to speak with a southern accent. I plan to take it to FL and let it loose, where it will be featured in yet another "Florida man" story.

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O Really
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Re: A Florida Man...

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Florida Man's gotcha on the cockroaches, though, fondly referred to as "palmetto bugs" and often used as guard animals.

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billy.pilgrim
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Re: A Florida Man...

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O Really wrote:
Mon Apr 01, 2019 9:02 am
Florida Man's gotcha on the cockroaches, though, fondly referred to as "palmetto bugs" and often used as guard animals.
Have you ever stepped on one and had a 2 ft. tape worm come out? Freaked my wife out when she stepped on the bug.
Trump: “We had the safest border in the history of our country - or at least recorded history. I guess maybe a thousand years ago it was even better.”

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O Really
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Re: A Florida Man...

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Never stepped on one - tripped over some in the dark, though.

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billy.pilgrim
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Re: A Florida Man...

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https://www.politico.com/magazine/amp/s ... ler-226483

Much less in the public eye but still a slimy pos.
As he was my congressman, I wrote him several letters and called a few times. Each time, within a couple of weeks, his office would respond with an automated letter to inform me that they took all inquiries seriously and that I would be contacted by a person within the coming weeks.

No one ever called.
Trump: “We had the safest border in the history of our country - or at least recorded history. I guess maybe a thousand years ago it was even better.”

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neoplacebo
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Re: A Florida Man...

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Just saw a story that says a St Lucie County guy who was just released from the county jail was arrested for breaking into cars in the jail parking lot; they got him on camera doing so. Oh, well.

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Vrede too
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Re: A Florida Man...

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neoplacebo wrote:
Sun Apr 07, 2019 2:24 pm
Just saw a story that says a St Lucie County guy who was just released from the county jail was arrested for breaking into cars in the jail parking lot; they got him on camera doing so. Oh, well.
It gets even better.

Florida man arrested for burglarizing cars in jail parking lot moments after being released

If you've already scored cigarettes, $547 in cash and an iPhone 7 worth approximately $1,000, LEAVE!

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Ah, Florida man! I hadn't heard your name in a couple of days. I was starting to get worried.
A clown with a flamethrower still has a flamethrower.
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O Really
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Re: A Florida Man...

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Tattooed Florida Man - I guess they had trouble with the eye witnesses...
https://canoe.com/news/crime/tattoo-fac ... -cold-case

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neoplacebo
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Re: A Florida Man...

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O Really wrote:
Mon Apr 08, 2019 6:36 pm
Tattooed Florida Man - I guess they had trouble with the eye witnesses...
https://canoe.com/news/crime/tattoo-fac ... -cold-case
He might be more recognizable if he'd had his ears tattooed completely in red instead of leaving them natural. "I don't know; he had a face that looked like it had been beaten with a tire iron about a dozen times but I remember his ears were bright red all over. It was awful."

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neoplacebo
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Re: A Florida Man...

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A Florida Man was arrested for stealing 300 bucks worth of stuff from K mart in Key West just days after buying an 8 million dollar island near there.

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Vrede too
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Re: A Florida Man...

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neoplacebo wrote:
Tue Apr 09, 2019 9:03 am
A Florida Man was arrested for stealing 300 bucks worth of stuff from K mart in Key West just days after buying an 8 million dollar island near there.
Man accused of stealing from Kmart days after buying $8 million private island
Andrew Lippi, 59, was accused of stealing about $300 worth of household goods.


:confusion-scratchheadblue:
A clown with a flamethrower still has a flamethrower.
-- Charlie Sykes on MSNBC
1312. ETTD.

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