Dumb headlines thread

[Vrede too]

I'd guess a regular car on the street at the end of the alley.

[Leo Lyons]

I'd guess a regular car on the street at the end of the alley.

My curiosity got the better of me:

"Streets with Street View imagery available are shown as blue lines on Google Maps. Google Street View displays panoramas of stitched images.
Most photography is done by car, but some is done by walking, boat, snowmobile, trekker, tricycle, and underwater apparatus."

Say what?? "Trekker?" Beam me up, Scotty!
Wonder if that's tri-sickle or tri-sykel?

[Vrede too]

Hiker.

[Leo Lyons]

Hiker.

[Leo Lyons]

Lowe's to close 51 stores, including 20 in the U.S.
Tomi Kilgore, MarketWatch

Lowe's Companies said Monday it will close 20 underperforming stores in the U.S. and 31 stores in Canada, as part of a strategic reassessment.
The home improvement retailer said most employees at the stores closing will be offered similar jobs at a nearby store,
as most of the stores being closed ate within 10 miles of another store.
I wonder how far away is the "nearby store"?

Moral of this story: If you want to keep your job, don't all the area Lowe's employees assemble in the same restaurant.

[O Really]

"Idaho Elementary Teachers Who Dressed Up As Mexicans And The Border Wall Suspended"

Wonder what they suspended the wall from.

[Vrede too]

"Idaho Elementary Teachers Who Dressed Up As Mexicans And The Border Wall Suspended"

Wonder what they suspended the wall from.

They're jerks, but hanging seems a little extreme . . . even for Idaho.

[billy.pilgrim]

Lowe's to close 51 stores, including 20 in the U.S.
Tomi Kilgore, MarketWatch

Lowe's Companies said Monday it will close 20 underperforming stores in the U.S. and 31 stores in Canada, as part of a strategic reassessment.
The home improvement retailer said most employees at the stores closing will be offered similar jobs at a nearby store,
as most of the stores being closed ate within 10 miles of another store.
I wonder how far away is the "nearby store"?

Moral of this story: If you want to keep your job, don't all the area Lowe's employees assemble in the same restaurant.

The break rooms at the 3 Lowe's in Pensacola are less than 10 miles apart.

[Leo Lyons]

The break rooms at the 3 Lowe's in Pensacola are less than 10 miles apart.

Apparently they're not 'underperforming' stores.

[billy.pilgrim]

The break rooms at the 3 Lowe's in Pensacola are less than 10 miles apart.

Apparently they're not 'underperforming' stores.

And all 3 are within 3 blocks of a Home Depot

[Leo Lyons]

The break rooms at the 3 Lowe's in Pensacola are less than 10 miles apart.

Apparently they're not 'under-performing' stores.

And all 3 are within 3 blocks of a Home Depot

Not to change the subject of the thread, but since we are discussing Lowe's, there are 2 downtown Lowe's Stores here on the island; one at 68th. & Broadway, and one not far from me on 6th.Ave. Who'd thunk, after shopping in some of their mammoth behemoths in a shopping center, that you'd find one downtown similar in nature as walking into, say a Woolworth's or S.S. Kresge like long ago? I've not been in either store, but at the same time, I can't imagine them to be anymore than a hardware and appliance store.
Being downtown stores, I can't see why in the world they would be under-performers

[O Really]

I'd guess the garden/lawn care sections, along with building supplies might be holding them back.
Naa, it's quite a small store, lower level of a building next to a Staples. Not exactly Lowe's usual market, and probably a bad choice to put one there.

[Vrede too]

Shot while praying: Deputies say the act of praying may have saved 14-year-old gir

A teen is recovering after deputies say she was shot in the arm while praying in her Houston, Texas, home....

Investigators said the 14-year-old girl was in her room, kneeling down and praying when a bullet came through the wall of her home.

Deputies said they believe the bullet was fired from an apartment complex near her home and stopped on her blanket.

The teen was taken to the hospital with non-life threatening injuries.

No arrests have been made, but deputies told Eyewitness News this situation could have been a lot worse if the girl had not been kneeling.

Or, she might have been shot in the abdomen or leg hitting a major artery if standing, anywhere on her body if already lying down, or missed entirely, or maybe it was the praying that cause the bullet to enter her room rather than going somewhere else.

[Leo Lyons]

Shot while praying: Deputies say the act of praying may have saved 14-year-old gir

Reckon it was this gir?



Or, she might have been shot in the abdomen or leg hitting a major artery if standing, anywhere on her body if already lying down, or missed entirely, or maybe it was the praying that cause the bullet to enter her room rather than going somewhere else.

The Lord works in mysterious ways.

[Vrede too]

One could quibble that 'by a landslide' would be better, but this headline isn't terrible. Even so . . .

Dennis Hof, Dead Brothel Owner From Nevada, Just Won In A Landslide

It would be really ironic if he had died in a landslide.

[O Really]

Not even going to touch this one...
"Mystery odor sends American Airlines plane full of cheerleaders back to Charlotte"

https://www.msn.com/en-us/travel/news/m ... ?ocid=iehp

[Vrede too]

Not even going to touch this one...
"Mystery odor sends American Airlines plane full of cheerleaders back to Charlotte"

https://www.msn.com/en-us/travel/news/m ... ?ocid=iehp

"the odor smelled like fire"

It was the copilot.

[O Really]

"Put a toilet paper roll in a jar to foil unwanted guests"

WTF? Simple explanation, what it really leads to (eventually) is an idea to hide small items, maybe jewelry. Put the toilet paper roll in a jar, fill the jar around the roll with something, and poof - you've got a good hiding place. Not a bad idea, but I've never heard thieves to be referred to as "unwanted guests."

[O Really]

"Kelly Ripa reveals secrets to sexy, strong marriage to Mark Consuelos"

I would have though Mark already knew that.

https://www.aol.com/article/entertainme ... /23595023/

[O Really]

"Jennifer Lopez and Alex Rodriguez trim the tree with their kids"