Just for Fun

[Ombudsman]

"Those are fun threads for some of us, Mr.B. Feel free to participate or not as you wish."

Glad you're having fun. I don't really care to dip my hands into a pizz bucket full of accusations. Thanks though, for the offer.

Damn son you are one grumpy mofo ain't ya?

[O Really]

Damn son you are one grumpy mofo ain't ya?

He's been grumpy for years. But it's just personality. Nothing personal.

[Mr.B]

"Damn son you are one grumpy mofo ain't ya?"

I've earned my grumpiness....what's your excuse? What's wrong with you anyway?

"He's been grumpy for years. But it's just personality. Nothing personal."

Gosh, thanks! Such kind, sweet words.....kinda gets to 'ya!

[Stinger]

[Stinger]

And this one goes out to Defective Thong.



That should be "upper middle-class Mexicans with leaf blowers.

[Ombudsman]

Blowing leaves ain't that hard. How about roofing a house? That's hard work.

[Stinger]

Blowing leaves ain't that hard. How about roofing a house? That's hard work.

Depends on whether or not you have your upper-middle-class Mexicans doing it.

(Try putting a roof on in Florida in July. I thought I was going to roll off the roof a couple of times.)

[Mr.B]

What I Have Discovered Now That I'm Older:

1. I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.

2. My wild oats are mostly enjoyed with prunes and all-bran.

3. I finally got my head together, and now my body is falling apart.

4. Funny, I don't remember being absent-minded.

5. Funny, I don't remember being absent-minded.

6. If all is not lost, then where the heck is it?

7. It was a whole lot easier to get older, than to get wiser.

8. Some days, you're the top dog, some days you're the hydrant.

9. I wish the buck really did stop here, I sure could use a few of them.

10. Kids in the back seat cause accidents.

11. Accidents in the back seat cause kids.

12. It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.

13. The world only beats a path to your door when you're in the bathroom.

14. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he'd have put them on my knees.

15. When I'm finally holding all the right cards, everyone wants to play chess.

16. It's not hard to meet expenses . . . they're everywhere.

17. The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

18. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter....I go somewhere to
get something, and then wonder what I'm "here after".

19. Funny, I don't remember being absent-minded.

[Wneglia]

How Bad Is The Ammo Shortage? This Bad.

Ammo is getting scarce! But this morning I lucked out and was able to buy two boxes of ammo.



I placed the boxes on the front seat and headed back home, but stopped at a gas station where a drop-dead gorgeous redhead in very short shorts was filling up her car at the next pump.



She glanced at the two boxes of ammo, bent over and leaned in my passenger window, and said in a sexy voice, “I’m a big believer in barter, old fella. Would you be interested in trading sex for ammo?”



I thought for a few seconds and asked,

“What kind of ammo ‘ya got?”

[O Really]

Nice to see there's an ammo shortage in Russia, too. Guess the NRA has gone international.

[Stinger]

I'm sure the ammo shortage is all Obama's fault. Just how did the NRA link that up?

[Stinger]

[Stinger]

No pimp around, so we can probably get away with this one.

[homerfobe]

OBAMA'S SPEECH-- Only about 30 seconds.
I am not an Obama fan but I must say this is very impressive! Give it a look, see, and a listen.

The following Obama short speech was delivered spontaneously and without the aid of his ubiquitous teleprompter, apparently while vacationing at Camp David. Delivered outdoors, it was apparently taped by an alert news person with a video camera.
The sound is good considering outdoor conditions and the apparent spontaneity of the event. Listen carefully to his words.
(Giving credit where credit is due, he makes more sense than anything he has said in over four years as President and current presidency.
He also looks much better without the TV makeup!)

The president's speech

[homerfobe]

Disney's new film called "Jet Black"--- the non-racist version of "Snow White," has been put on hold.
All of the 7 dwarfs: Dealer, Stealer, Mugger, Forger, Drive By, Pimp, and Nowuti'msayin have refused to sing "Hi Ho"
because they say it offends black prostitutes.

They also say they have no intention of singing "It's off to work we go."

[homerfobe]

Odd, the only poster here that we know is not working and living off the government dole is homerfobe. Having declared himself over and over to be gay maybe he's finally admitting to being black, too.

Your jealousy is a real pisser. Just because you were too stupid to pursue or hang on to a long term career, you lash out at anyone who did.
I have never admitted to being a queer (or Black---NTTAWWT); you're the goofball slinging accusations.

In case you missed the point; what I posted are JOKES, ever hear of a joke? Don't be so damned thin skinned.

[homerfobe]

24 years now, 4 years longer than military retirement eligibility. You've screwed up, again.

Wow! 24 years working in the private sector. I'm so proud of you. What will you have to show for it when you retire? Will you get free medical care?
Or will you be living hand to mouth off your Social Security? Call it living off the gummit's tit all you want; you had a chance to make your career choice,
but you chose the protest everything route. I chose one that has fulfilled my expectations.
Go fume about what I have that's better than yours on someone's shoulder who cares. Pissy-assed crybaby.

[bannination]

It took me a fair amount of time to see it.

[homerfobe]

I would not consider my life "better" if I had and was living off of you the way you did and are living off of me, you prissy-assed drag (nttawwt) and welfare queen.

Like I said, your jealousy is a pisser.

[O Really]

Government employment, including military, federal and state, has long been considered a good choice for a fairly secure, stable career with retirement benefits way better than private sector. Nothing wrong with that. It becomes wrong when somebody chooses that path and then spends the rest of their life bitching about what a sorry damgummint we have.