Dumb headlines thread

[O Really]

Biden: Disappointing jobs report shows recovery "is a sprint, not a marathon"
Axios

Which is exactly opposite of what the article actually said.

[Vrede too]

Biden: Disappointing jobs report shows recovery "is a sprint, not a marathon"
Axios

Which is exactly opposite of what the article actually said.

Maybe there's a job opening for a headline writer?

The Telegraph via Yahoo: What a bridge on North Korea's secret border says about China's cold war with the West

There's no such thing as a "secret border" and the word "secret" does not appear in the article. Maybe an autocorrect of "sealed border"?

[Vrede too]

Senators say U.S. will give 750,000 COVID doses to Taiwan amid reports China blocking vaccines

That's rather mean. I thought we liked Taiwan. Maybe Joe really is a commie.

The headline has since been fixed at the Axios source:

U.S. donating COVID vaccines to Taiwan amid reports China blocking doses

I wonder if Yahoo will catch up.

[Vrede too]

Headline in the right-wing "Washington Times"

"Biden administration sides with cheerleader in First Amendment case"

Nothing wrong with that, except that it didn't.

Must have been quite the sight to see the administration "wadding"

Moonie Times headline fixed now:
Biden administration sides against cheerleader in First Amendment case

However, Joe still "wadded into” the issue . I guess it beats Dolt .45's waddling.

I like the ACLU, but maybe it can find more important things to fight for than JV cheer slots.

Well, fuck me! Cheerleader and ACLU win, the school and Joe lose, and SCOTUS ignores my priorities 8-1.

Supreme Court says cheerleader’s f-bombs protected under First Amendment

[neoplacebo]

Hell, I send fuck bombs to my alleged representatives on a pretty regular basis and I've not even been to general sessions court. I even send fuck bombs to lesser authorities and these are generally even more graphic and vile. Even if I sent them on Facebook I'd also send valid reasons for them. I'm considering sending a fuck bomb to the asshole who voted against fuck bombs.

[Vrede too]

Hell, I send fuck bombs to my alleged representatives on a pretty regular basis and I've not even been to general sessions court. I even send fuck bombs to lesser authorities and these are generally even more graphic and vile. Even if I sent them on Facebook I'd also send valid reasons for them. I'm considering sending a fuck bomb to the asshole who voted against fuck bombs.

SCOTUS now says that you can be a JV cheerleader.

[neoplacebo]

Hell, I send fuck bombs to my alleged representatives on a pretty regular basis and I've not even been to general sessions court. I even send fuck bombs to lesser authorities and these are generally even more graphic and vile. Even if I sent them on Facebook I'd also send valid reasons for them. I'm considering sending a fuck bomb to the asshole who voted against fuck bombs.

SCOTUS now says that you can be a JV cheerleader.

I suspect my reaction to being accepted on the squad would be identical to this girl's reaction at being rejected. Fuck bombs.

[Ulysses]

I suspect my reaction to being accepted on the squad would be identical to this girl's reaction at being rejected. Fuck bombs.

A fuck bomb a day keeps the school disciplinarian away...

[Vrede too]

SCOTUS now says that you can be a JV cheerleader.

I suspect my reaction to being accepted on the squad would be identical to this girl's reaction at being rejected. Fuck bombs.

I admire her perseverance and accomplishment in defense of the 1st Amendment. However, I think the plaque honoring the "Fucking Cheerleader" in the school's trophy case is a little much.

[neoplacebo]

SCOTUS now says that you can be a JV cheerleader.

I suspect my reaction to being accepted on the squad would be identical to this girl's reaction at being rejected. Fuck bombs.

I admire her perseverance and accomplishment in defense of the 1st Amendment. However, I think the plaque honoring the "Fucking Cheerleader" in the school's trophy case is a little much.

Yeah, I'm all for 1st amendment activism; even if it's the wingnut variety. But maybe the plaque should be placed at the Fu Keene Great restaurant in NH. I think it was next to the city hall. Or maybe it was the Great Fu Keene restaurant. All those Fu Keene things sort of run together.

[Vrede too]

I Used a Scooter to Hike Yellowstone—and Came Face to Face With a Bear



That's a pic of a grizzly/brown bear. The article is about an encounter with a black bear in Yosemite, not a grizzly/brown in Yellowstone. :confusion-scratchheadblue:

[billy.pilgrim]

I Used a Scooter to Hike Yellowstone—and Came Face to Face With a Bear



That's a pic of a grizzly/brown bear. The article is about an encounter with a black bear in Yosemite, not a grizzly/brown in Yellowstone. :confusion-scratchheadblue:

All bears are bears

[Vrede too]

All bears are bears

All parks are parks, too?

[Vrede too]

Shooting suspect not found in home after hours-long standoff with Kansas City police

Is it really a "standoff" if only one team is playing?

[neoplacebo]

I guess it's a stand oof. The only way to salvage it is for some cop to shoot himself in the foot or shoot another cop. Or maybe burn something down.

[Ulysses]

1) The linked article clearly says "Yosemite".

2) The article itself says it's a black bear, not a grizzly. To wit: "Its head was a foot wide, including ears—the size of a grizzly, but there have only been black bear species in this area for decades (and they can be either brown or black in color). "

3) Without a profile shot that would show the grizzly bear's distinct hump (which black bears don't have), it's difficult to tell from the photo. The long claws in the photo may indicate it's a grizzly. But in any case the photo was most likely the editor's choice, not the author's doing.

4) The article author is partially disabled (polio leg) so let's cut her some slack. I see that the article was updated a day after it was first published on Daily Beast, so the noted errors may have been corrected in the update. Again, I suspect it was editorial ignorance at work. Having written for a newspaper, I am familiar with editorial goofs. Seems to go with the territory.

https://www.yellowstone.org/how-to-iden ... c0QAvD_BwE

[Ulysses]

All bears are bears

True, but grizzlies are generally more prone to attack humans than black bears. That, plus, they are much bigger and badder.

I have had a number of encounters with black bears. In Yosemite, no less. Never felt afraid, except one time when it was really my fault. All I lost was a pillow sack with the remnants of my food (freeze dried soup). And food generally is all the black bear is interested in, unless one comes between a mother and her cubs. I understand grizzlies can be more aggressive and regard people as tasty snacks, too.

And yes, you cannot tell by the color: black bears come in both brown and black.

[O Really]

And yes, you cannot tell by the color: black bears come in both brown and black.

Sure, but the grizzlies have the 'ump.

[Vrede too]

Ummm,
The difference between the two parks in the headline and the article is my point. Duh.
I didn’t say that color is the issue.

The grizzly bear (Ursus arctos horribilis), also known as the North American brown bear or simply grizzly, is a population or subspecies of the brown bear inhabiting North America....

The brown bear (Ursus arctos) is a large bear species found across Eurasia and North America....

Didn't you know?
One CAN differentiate between black bears and grizzly/brown bears by their faces, claws and ears. If you wait to see a hump in profile, you may be dead.
I did NOT blame the author. This is the “Dumb headlines thread” (pay attention!), and both headlines and photos are almost always editor’s choices.
I am fine with what the author wrote. That said, her being "partially disabled" is irrelevant. "let's cut her some slack" is insulting to her and to all disabled people. Shame on you.
The headline was indeed fixed to read "Yosemite", but it's still a pic of a grizzly/brown bear. Half credit.
billy.pilgrim was clearly mocking the editor. He’s posted many times about the black bears in his neighborhood, so I doubt he needs pretentious lecturing from you.
I can see why they stopped letting you write for a newspaper.

Better stick to topics you know, city boy.

Guess:

[Ulysses]

And yes, you cannot tell by the color: black bears come in both brown and black.

Sure, but the grizzlies have the 'ump.

LOL, as I said:

"Without a profile shot that would show the grizzly bear's distinct hump (which black bears don't have), it's difficult to tell from the photo."