Events or Things Conservatives pretend never happened.

[bannination]

''I was dabbling into every other kind of religion before I became a Christian. I was dabbling in witchcraft, I've dabbled in Buddhism. I would have become a Hare Krishna but I didn't want to become a vegetarian. And that is honestly the reason why -- because I'm Italian, I love meatballs!''
—Delaware GOP Senate candidate Christine O'Donnell, on ''Politically Incorrect,'' July 19, 1999

[bannination]

''Feminism was established so as to allow unattractive women easier access to the mainstream of society.''
—Rush Limbaugh

[bannination]

''When I see a 9/11 victim family on television, or whatever, I'm just like, 'Oh shut up' I'm so sick of them because they're always complaining.''
—Glenn Beck, Sept. 9, 2005

[bannination]

''I hope that's not where we're going, but you know if this Congress keeps going the way it is, people are really looking toward those Second Amendment remedies and saying my goodness what can we do to turn this country around? I'll tell you the first thing we need to do is take Harry Reid out.''
—Sharron Angle, the Tea Party candidate who won the Republican nomination in Nevada's Senate primary, floating the possibility of armed insurrection, interview with right-wing talk radio host Lars Larson in Portland, OR, January 2010

[bannination]

''I'm ashamed of what happened in the White House yesterday. I think it is a tragedy in the first proportion that a private corporation can be subjected to what I would characterize as a shakedown -- in this case a $20 billion shakedown ... I'm only speaking for myself. I'm not speaking for anyone else, but I apologize. I do not want to live in a county where anytime a citizen or a corporation does something that is legitimately wrong, [it is] subject to some sort of political pressure that, again, in my words, amounts to a shakedown.''
—Rep. Joe Barton (R-Tex.) during a congressional hearing with BP CEO Tony Hayward, referring to a $20 billion fund for damages that President Obama pressured BP to set up to pay for the Gulf oil spill. Barton, the biggest recipient of oil and gas industry campaign contributions in the House of Representatives, was later forced by Republican leaders to apologize for his BP apology

[bannination]

''Baby Killer!''
—Rep. Randy Neugebauer (R-Texas), shouting at Rep. Bart Stupak (D-MI) as he spoke on the House floor during the health care vote. Stupak had led a group of pro-life Democrats who fought to change language in the bill to prevent federal funds from being used for abortions, but ended opposition after reaching a last-minute deal with President Obama

[Stinger]

''Feminism was established so as to allow unattractive women easier access to the mainstream of society.''
—Rush Limbaugh

As chauvinism was established so as to allow fat, unattractive, blowhard men easier access to the mainstream of society ... fortunately for Rush.

[rstrong]

Terrorists take over the White House and attack the President big spectacular operations, in the new movies Olympus Has Fallen, G.I. Joe: Retaliation and White House Down

Bush II was almost taken out, in the White House, by a pretzel.

[Stinger]

''I hope that's not where we're going, but you know if this Congress keeps going the way it is, people are really looking toward those Second Amendment remedies and saying my goodness what can we do to turn this country around? I'll tell you the first thing we need to do is take Harry Reid out.''
—Sharron Angle, the Tea Party candidate who won the Republican nomination in Nevada's Senate primary, floating the possibility of armed insurrection, interview with right-wing talk radio host Lars Larson in Portland, OR, January 2010

Armed insurrection? If you're already talking about "second amendment remedies," what does "take Harry Reid out" suggest?

The Secret Service should have paid her a call after that one.

[bannination]

I do not believe in taking away the right of the citizen for sporting, for hunting and so forth, or for home defence. But I do believe that an AK-47...is not a sporting weapon or needed for defense of a home.
—Ronald Reagan



"Whenever we read the obscene stories, the voluptuous debaucheries, the cruel and torturous executions, the unrelenting vindictiveness with which more than half the Bible is filled, it would be more consistent that we called it the word of a demon than the word of God. It is a history of wickedness that has served to corrupt and brutalize mankind." -Thomas Paine, The Age of Reason

"The way to see by faith is to shut the eye of reason. Lighthouses are more helpful than churches." -Benjamin Franklin

"I have examined all the known superstitions of the world, and I do not find in our particular superstition of Christianity one redeeming feature. They are all alike, founded on fables and mythology. Millions of innocent men, women and children, since the introduction of Christianity, have been burnt, tortured, fined and imprisoned. What has been the effect of this coercion? To make one half the world fools and the other half hypocrites; to support roguery and error all over the earth." -Thomas Jefferson

"What has been [Christianity's] fruits? More or less, in all places, pride and indolence in the clergy; ignorance and servility in the laity; in both, superstition, bigotry and persecution." -James Madison

"There is nothing which can better deserve our patronage than the promotion of science and literature. Knowledge is in every country the surest basis of public happiness." -George Washington

Art. 11. As the Government of the United States of America is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion; as it has in itself no character of enmity against the laws, religion, or tranquility, of Mussulmen; and, as the said States never entered into any war, or act of hostility against any Mahometan nation, it is declared by the parties, that no pretext arising from religious opinions, shall ever produce an interruption of the harmony existing between the two countries.

[Boatrocker]

"I cannot see how a man of any large degree of humorous perception can ever be religious -- unless he purposely shut the eyes of his mind & keep them shut by force."
Samuel Clemens/Mark Twain

[Wneglia]

Do zombie stories trace their origin to to the resurrection?

Jesus vs. Zombies: 'Walking Dead' Beats 'The Bible' Ratings on Easter Sunday

"Jesus vs. Zombies" would be a cool series.

Speaking of Zombies and cannibals....

If they had to live off the brains of Obama supporters, they would starve.

[rstrong]

CNN Belief Blog: When evangelicals were pro-choice

Hey, remember when evangelicals were pro-choice because of the Bible? What a difference 30 years makes.