It was so much fun in fourth grade- which is just about the intellectual peak of most wingnuts. And not a bright fourth-grader, either, just the ones who go on to be the sort of adults who play pocket pool while watching kids on the playground. Maybe we should start referring to homer as "Aqualung."Vrede wrote:Cute but, honestly, is there anything that doesn't spark your homoerotic fantasies and is there any thread you won't bring your childish nastiness to?
Just for Fun
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Boatrocker
- Lieutenant Commander
- Posts: 2066
- Joined: Thu Jan 03, 2013 11:53 am
- Location: Southeast of Disorder
Re: Just for Fun
People are crazy and times are strange. I'm locked in tight, I'm out of range.
I used to care, but, things have changed.
I used to care, but, things have changed.
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Mr.B
- A bad person.
- Posts: 4891
- Joined: Tue Jun 18, 2013 4:22 pm
Re: Just for Fun
Remember, the thread title is "Just for Fun".......
The young gynecologist had just opened his practice and was rather nervous in his new profession.
To help calm his jitters, he would sometimes whistle softly during his examinations.
He was examining one middle-aged lady, when she suddenly burst out laughing....
Jumping back, he said "I'm sorry, did I tickle you?"
"No", she replied, "you were whistling 'I wish I were an Oscar Meyer wiener' "
The young gynecologist had just opened his practice and was rather nervous in his new profession.
To help calm his jitters, he would sometimes whistle softly during his examinations.
He was examining one middle-aged lady, when she suddenly burst out laughing....
Jumping back, he said "I'm sorry, did I tickle you?"
"No", she replied, "you were whistling 'I wish I were an Oscar Meyer wiener' "
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Mr.B
- A bad person.
- Posts: 4891
- Joined: Tue Jun 18, 2013 4:22 pm
Re: Just for Fun
WHERE ARE MY GLASSES????
Yesterday my daughter e-mailed me again asking why I didn't do something useful with my time..........
Like sitting around the pool and drinking wine or playing solitaire is not a good thing.
Talking about my "doing something useful" seems to be her favorite topic of conversation.
She was "only thinking of me" and suggested I go down to the senior center and hang out with the guys.
I did this and when I got home last night I decided to teach her a lesson about staying out of my business.
I e-mailed her and told her that I had joined a parachute club.
She replied, "Are you nuts? You are 73 years old, and now you're going to start jumping out of airplanes?"
I told her that I even got a membership card and e-mailed a copy to her.
She immediately telephoned me, "Good grief, where are your glasses!
This is a membership to a "Prostitute Club", not a Parachute Club."
"Oh man! I'm in trouble again I replied..... I really don't know what to do... I signed up for five jumps a week!"
The line went quiet...........
Life as a senior citizen is not getting any easier but sometimes it can be fun!
Yesterday my daughter e-mailed me again asking why I didn't do something useful with my time..........
Like sitting around the pool and drinking wine or playing solitaire is not a good thing.
Talking about my "doing something useful" seems to be her favorite topic of conversation.
She was "only thinking of me" and suggested I go down to the senior center and hang out with the guys.
I did this and when I got home last night I decided to teach her a lesson about staying out of my business.
I e-mailed her and told her that I had joined a parachute club.
She replied, "Are you nuts? You are 73 years old, and now you're going to start jumping out of airplanes?"
I told her that I even got a membership card and e-mailed a copy to her.
She immediately telephoned me, "Good grief, where are your glasses!
This is a membership to a "Prostitute Club", not a Parachute Club."
"Oh man! I'm in trouble again I replied..... I really don't know what to do... I signed up for five jumps a week!"
The line went quiet...........
Life as a senior citizen is not getting any easier but sometimes it can be fun!
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bannination
- Captain
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- Location: Hendersonville
- Contact:
Re: Just for Fun
5 minute exhaust repair.
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bannination
- Captain
- Posts: 5650
- Joined: Sun Sep 16, 2012 7:58 am
- Location: Hendersonville
- Contact:
Re: Just for Fun
hahha loose morals
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Wneglia
- Midshipman
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- Joined: Tue Sep 18, 2012 7:00 pm
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homerfobe
- Ensign
- Posts: 1565
- Joined: Sun Oct 14, 2012 9:37 am
- Location: All over more than anywhere else.
Re: Just for Fun
Vrede wrote:Cute but, honestly, is there anything that doesn't spark your homoerotic fantasies
I have no fantasies of queers or queer activities, plenty of normal fantasies though.
and is there any thread you won't bring your childish nastiness to?
What would be the fun in that? This the Just for Fun thread isn't it?
Proudly Telling It Like It Is: In Your Face! Whether You Like It Or Not!
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homerfobe
- Ensign
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- Joined: Sun Oct 14, 2012 9:37 am
- Location: All over more than anywhere else.
Re: Just for Fun
So you're saying only faggot fantasies are normal? In your world. You've screwed up, again.Vrede wrote:You're the one that immediately thought of gay fellatio.
If they're "normal" they're not fantasies. You've screwed up, again.
Proudly Telling It Like It Is: In Your Face! Whether You Like It Or Not!
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homerfobe
- Ensign
- Posts: 1565
- Joined: Sun Oct 14, 2012 9:37 am
- Location: All over more than anywhere else.
Re: Just for Fun
How to turn a number 1 into a number 2:
Proudly Telling It Like It Is: In Your Face! Whether You Like It Or Not!
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Mr.B
- A bad person.
- Posts: 4891
- Joined: Tue Jun 18, 2013 4:22 pm
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Mr.B
- A bad person.
- Posts: 4891
- Joined: Tue Jun 18, 2013 4:22 pm
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Wneglia
- Midshipman
- Posts: 1103
- Joined: Tue Sep 18, 2012 7:00 pm
Re: Just for Fun
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billy.pilgrim
- Admiral
- Posts: 15632
- Joined: Wed Oct 10, 2012 1:44 pm
Re: Just for Fun
lexington bbq
take poor cut of pork
roast
shred
pour vinegar on it
pretend you did something special
Trump: “We had the safest border in the history of our country - or at least recorded history. I guess maybe a thousand years ago it was even better.”
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O Really
- Admiral
- Posts: 23562
- Joined: Tue Sep 18, 2012 3:37 pm
Re: Just for Fun
Not exactly, Tex... http://www.southernliving.com/travel/so ... 000062325/
But there are some "pretenders" who follow your recipe. Bet not every Texan turns out barbecue like City Market, eh?
But there are some "pretenders" who follow your recipe. Bet not every Texan turns out barbecue like City Market, eh?
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bannination
- Captain
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Bungalow Bill
- Ensign
- Posts: 1340
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Re: Just for Fun
Well, idiots from every state go to the supermarket to stock up
when they think it's going to snow, even if it only snows one inch.
Extra points for wearing thick large snowboots, as if you're living
in Alaska.
Yeah, Second in Flight just doesn't cut it.
when they think it's going to snow, even if it only snows one inch.
Extra points for wearing thick large snowboots, as if you're living
in Alaska.
Yeah, Second in Flight just doesn't cut it.
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billy.pilgrim
- Admiral
- Posts: 15632
- Joined: Wed Oct 10, 2012 1:44 pm
Re: Just for Fun
O Really wrote:Not exactly, Tex... http://www.southernliving.com/travel/so ... 000062325/
But there are some "pretenders" who follow your recipe. Bet not every Texan turns out barbecue like City Market, eh?
shoulder = cheap cut, for true (boston butt ain't pig butt)
spent a week in lexington and tried like way hard to find good q, went to all the recommended places, but none measured even close to eastern carolina, south carolina, alabama, mississippi or even tennessee bbq
sure they got pig statues all over town and somehow a rep for bbq, but they be lacking - serving shredded shoulder in a little cardboard box with vinegar poured over just ani't gonna cut it with most southerners
Trump: “We had the safest border in the history of our country - or at least recorded history. I guess maybe a thousand years ago it was even better.”
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O Really
- Admiral
- Posts: 23562
- Joined: Tue Sep 18, 2012 3:37 pm
Re: Just for Fun
I'm no barbecue expert, and probably wouldn't even qualify as opinion-worthy in NC since my favorite variety is St.Louis style dry rub ribs. And what's more, I've never been to Lexington. But I've had some "Lexington style" barbecue that was some good eating.
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Wneglia
- Midshipman
- Posts: 1103
- Joined: Tue Sep 18, 2012 7:00 pm
Re: Just for Fun
Now you know why legal fees are so high.
The beauty of a language and the art of constructing the words of the
language significantly lead to their meaning. This is not a case of
twisting, but of the refined manner of presentation by witty minds. A
good case for reference.
One evening, after attending the theatre, Santa and Banta were walking
down the avenue when they observed a rather well dressed and attractive young
lady walking ahead of them. Santa turned to Banta and remarked,
"I'd give $250 to spend the night with that woman."
Much to their surprise, the young lady overheard their remark, turned
around, and replied, "I'll take you up on that offer." She had a neat
appearance and a pleasant voice, so after bidding Banta good night,
Santa accompanied the young lady to her apartment.
The following morning, as he prepared to leave, Santa gave her $125. She
demanded the rest of the money, stating, "If you don't give me the other
$125 I'll sue you for it." Santa laughed, saying, "I'd like to see you
get it on these grounds."
Within a few days, Santa was surprised when he received a summon
ordering his presence in court as a defendant in a lawsuit. He hurried to his lawyer
and explained the details of the case.
His lawyer said, "She can't possibly get a judgment against you on such
grounds, but it will be interesting to see how her case will be presented."
After the usual preliminaries, the lady's Lawyer addressed the court as
follows: "Your honour, my client, this lady, is the owner of a piece of
property, a garden spot, surrounded by a profuse growth of shrubbery,
which property she agreed to rent to the defendant for a specified length of
time for the sum of $250. The defendant took possession of the property,
used it extensively for the purposes for which it was rented, but upon
evacuating the premises, he paid only $125, one-half of the amount agreed upon. The
rent was not excessive, since it is restricted property, and we ask judgment
be granted against the defendant to assure payment of the balance."
Defendant Santa's Lawyer was not only surprised but also impressed and
amused by the way his opponent had presented the case. Naturally, his defence was
somewhat different from the way he originally planned to present it. He rose
to the occasion!
'Your honour," he said, "My client agrees that the lady has a fine
piece of property, that he did rent such property for a time, and a degree of
pleasure was derived from the transaction. However, my client found a
well on the property around which he placed his own stones, sunk a shaft, and
erected a pump, all labour performed personally by him. We claim these
improvements to the property were sufficient to offset the unpaid amount,
and that the plaintiff was adequately compensated for the rental of said
property. We, therefore, ask that judgment not be granted."
The young lady's lawyer answered, "Your honour, my client agrees that
the defendant did find a well on her property. However, had the defendant
not known that the well existed, he would never have rented the property.
Also, upon evacuating the premises, the defendant removed the stones, pulled
out the shaft, and took the pump with him. In doing so, he not only dragged
the equipment through the shrubbery, but left the hole much larger than it
was prior to his occupancy, making the property much less desirable to
others.
We, therefore, ask that judgment be granted."
In the Judge's decision, he provided for two options: "Pay the balance
$125 to the plaintiff or have the equipment detached from its current
location and provide it to the plaintiff for damages."
The defendant Santa wrote out a check immediately
The beauty of a language and the art of constructing the words of the
language significantly lead to their meaning. This is not a case of
twisting, but of the refined manner of presentation by witty minds. A
good case for reference.
One evening, after attending the theatre, Santa and Banta were walking
down the avenue when they observed a rather well dressed and attractive young
lady walking ahead of them. Santa turned to Banta and remarked,
"I'd give $250 to spend the night with that woman."
Much to their surprise, the young lady overheard their remark, turned
around, and replied, "I'll take you up on that offer." She had a neat
appearance and a pleasant voice, so after bidding Banta good night,
Santa accompanied the young lady to her apartment.
The following morning, as he prepared to leave, Santa gave her $125. She
demanded the rest of the money, stating, "If you don't give me the other
$125 I'll sue you for it." Santa laughed, saying, "I'd like to see you
get it on these grounds."
Within a few days, Santa was surprised when he received a summon
ordering his presence in court as a defendant in a lawsuit. He hurried to his lawyer
and explained the details of the case.
His lawyer said, "She can't possibly get a judgment against you on such
grounds, but it will be interesting to see how her case will be presented."
After the usual preliminaries, the lady's Lawyer addressed the court as
follows: "Your honour, my client, this lady, is the owner of a piece of
property, a garden spot, surrounded by a profuse growth of shrubbery,
which property she agreed to rent to the defendant for a specified length of
time for the sum of $250. The defendant took possession of the property,
used it extensively for the purposes for which it was rented, but upon
evacuating the premises, he paid only $125, one-half of the amount agreed upon. The
rent was not excessive, since it is restricted property, and we ask judgment
be granted against the defendant to assure payment of the balance."
Defendant Santa's Lawyer was not only surprised but also impressed and
amused by the way his opponent had presented the case. Naturally, his defence was
somewhat different from the way he originally planned to present it. He rose
to the occasion!
'Your honour," he said, "My client agrees that the lady has a fine
piece of property, that he did rent such property for a time, and a degree of
pleasure was derived from the transaction. However, my client found a
well on the property around which he placed his own stones, sunk a shaft, and
erected a pump, all labour performed personally by him. We claim these
improvements to the property were sufficient to offset the unpaid amount,
and that the plaintiff was adequately compensated for the rental of said
property. We, therefore, ask that judgment not be granted."
The young lady's lawyer answered, "Your honour, my client agrees that
the defendant did find a well on her property. However, had the defendant
not known that the well existed, he would never have rented the property.
Also, upon evacuating the premises, the defendant removed the stones, pulled
out the shaft, and took the pump with him. In doing so, he not only dragged
the equipment through the shrubbery, but left the hole much larger than it
was prior to his occupancy, making the property much less desirable to
others.
We, therefore, ask that judgment be granted."
In the Judge's decision, he provided for two options: "Pay the balance
$125 to the plaintiff or have the equipment detached from its current
location and provide it to the plaintiff for damages."
The defendant Santa wrote out a check immediately