The Religion Thread

[bannination]

Even Einstein didn't think God played dice..... but Einstein was wrong.

[Mr.B]

"Your point was exclusively about tithing to the church. I'm the one that highlighted her commitment to education, her being black and her child's cerebral palsy. We have different measures for JTA's "seems alright, and alright people are alright by me."
Maybe in you haste to crow and belittle, you missed this...?
"It's really heartwarming to see a story like this...I'm happy to see that someone who really needs the money got one of life's biggest breaks. I just hope now that she seeks God's wisdom when it comes to dealing with such a large sum of money, and fending off the vultures and long-lost relatives."
Nah, you couldn't see that; you were all bent out of sorts because I also praised her remark about tithing; something some stingy gloat like you would never consider; even if you knew it would go to help the needy. That's why you have "more money than you need"; you're so stingy and selfish.

Fantasizing incorrectly about me, again. Your record's stuck.
Fantasizing incorrectly about me fantasizing about you. Your record's stuck because that's a big part of your limited vocabulary..

I just hope now that her church has the wisdom and morality to provide for the needy rather than acting like the self-aggrandizing vultures that so many churches are.
So, how many churches have you been in that you know to be like that, Mr. Church Lady/Broken Record?

[Mr.B]

wrote:
"It's adorable how you regularly mimic me and rarely make any sense doing so."

Think maybe it's because you don't make sense to begin with? You're so original and predictable, one can't help but admire your finely-honed talents to the point of wanting to be just like you....

[billy.pilgrim]

nutso jumping Jehovah


http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nati ... /23500593/

stomping on the woman's neck as part of a bizarre bid to convert her to Christianity.

[Boatrocker]

nutso jumping Jehovah


http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nati ... /23500593/

stomping on the woman's neck as part of a bizarre bid to convert her to Christianity.

It is a slight improvement over burning them.

[Mr.B]

nutso jumping Jehovah

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nati ... /23500593/

stomping on the woman's neck as part of a bizarre bid to convert her to Christianity.

One of those "real Christians".....

Wow. In my professional experience the wackos obsess about religion or sex more than anything else.
Mr.B does both.

The bigger "professional" wacko obsessively fantasizes that I obsess about religion or sex more than anything else.

[neoplacebo]

nutso jumping Jehovah


http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nati ... /23500593/

stomping on the woman's neck as part of a bizarre bid to convert her to Christianity.

Perfectly understandable; after all, everyone knows the neck is where the belief in Jesus resides. I think the kicking in the stomach was a little off the sermon, though. The best part of all is how the Jesus neck wrangler believes she's an officer of the court and if she believes it, it must be true.

[Mr.B]

"Perfectly understandable; after all, everyone knows the neck is where the belief in Jesus resides. I think the kicking in the stomach was a little off the sermon, though. The best part of all is how the Jesus neck wrangler believes she's an officer of the court and if she believes it, it must be true."

Watching "COPS" reruns.

[bannination]

More Christian logic:



Dat baby is smart.

[neoplacebo]

Baby says "what the hell are you people trying to do to me? I just got out of a deal like this a few months ago."

[Mr.B]

Must be that time of the month around Banni's house again...he's on his monthly anti-religion rant.

[rstrong]

Dat baby is smart.

He probably heard stories from the choir boys about having to assume that position in front of priests.

[Mr.B]

"Misogyny."
Sounds like he has a personal problem to me.

"Bet the priest does it back first next time."
Probably not...I've seen those videos where the kid strikes first!

"Dat baby is smart."

"He probably heard stories from the choir boys about having to assume that position in front of priests."
I thought about that, but decided to be nice.

[Mr.B]

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.

The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.

The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.

Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.

The little girl said, 'When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah'.

The teacher asked, 'What if Jonah went to hell?'

The little girl replied, 'Then you ask him'.

[Mr.B]

They're both wrong.

Sperm whales, for example, feed on giant squid, colossal squid, Humboldt squid and megamouth shark. However, since they can't chew, Jonah could have been swallowed but would have been crushed by the very thick muscular walls of the first stomach. Science.

I like mine better.

[Boatrocker]

. . . I like mine better.

That is religion in a nutshell. And I do mean nut shell.

[Mr.B]

. . . I like mine better.

That is religion in a nutshell. And I do mean nut shell.

Whatever rocks your boat. Obviously, you're good at it.

[Boatrocker]

It's one of my many skills and pleasures.

[O Really]

The good part about religious belief is that if your primary document, such as the Bible, doesn't match plausibility, you can just make up alternate rationale... http://www.icr.org/article/did-jonah-re ... -by-whale/

[Mr.B]

Good article O Really....thanks.

Some argue whether it was a "great fish", as first described, or a "whale" as Jesus mentioned. I don't consider either an issue.

FWIW, it could've been a whale shark, which is one very large fish, but not a whale at all. Although a filter feeder and no threat to humans, it's mouth fully opens to a width of 4.9 feet which could easily swallow a human.

If the Bible says that Jonah was swallowed and lived three days, and Jesus confirmed it, I'm satisfied with that.