Stephen Colbert Insults Two Canadian Cities

[rstrong]

In his new book America Again: Re-becoming the Greatness We Never Weren’t, in a chapter about green energy, Stephen Colbert writes:

“Before we can harness geothermal power, we have to take the planet’s temperature with a geothermometer. And I have no idea where the Earth’s rectum is!”

A footnote at the bottom of the page simply reads “Windsor, Canada.”

As a Winnipegger I'm insulted. That's Winnipeg's title.

[rstrong]

Addendum: Winnipeg's current title is "Where the industrial despair of the east meets the agricultural despair of the west!"

I stand corrected.

[O Really]

I love Ottawa, Cape Breton, Vancouver, and Montreal. But isn't Winnipeg the coldest city over 500,00 population or something in the effin' world? If true, that's reason enough to live somewhere else.

[rstrong]

I love Ottawa, Cape Breton, Vancouver, and Montreal. But isn't Winnipeg the coldest city over 500,00 population or something in the effin' world? If true, that's reason enough to live somewhere else.

Some times the temperature won't rise above -30C (-22F) for a full month, day or night. But the coldest temperature I've been outside in was -47C (-52.6F) up north in The Pas. These temperatures are *without* wind chill.

A few years ago a weather station just north-west of the city was the coldest spot on earth, including both poles. I had a lot of trouble getting into my car; even with the doors unlocked the door mechanisms were frozen. Anyone who didn't leave their car plugged in overnight wasn't going anywhere.

Alas, the theory that "the cold keeps out the riff-raff" has been thoroughly disproven.

[O Really]

Uff-da! The coldest (without wind chill) I've ever been out in is -28F, and that was pretty miserable. I guess that would be a balmy winter day to you. What's the average time between last frost in the spring and first frost in the fall...or is there a gap?

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I've seen rain in January and frost in July.

Snow is usually gone by the end of March, but we can still get a major dump into April. (The flood of 1997 was made worse by a blizzard down south in North Dakota on April 5th.) The first light snow can be in early September, but usually early October. The snow that *stays*, used to be a week or two either side of Halloween. Now it's usually a couple weeks later.

We don't have great falls. I was in southern Ontario this fall and the leaves were *spectacular*. In Winnipeg things just turn brown and then grey for a while before the snow hits.

Right now it's that special time of year when all the birds turn color and fall from the trees.

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...What's the average time between last frost in the spring and first frost in the fall...?

July 15.

You win.

[rstrong]

Colbert attack on 'Earth's rectum' Windsor extends to Winnipeg, CBC

“It is my job to ask these probing questions,” Colbert said on his show. “It could just as easily be Winnipeg.”

Better. Thankyou.

Remember, when the rest of the world is going down the sewer, Winnipeg is coming up it.

[neoplacebo]

Two things I've never considered funny; Stephen Colbert and cold weather.

[rstrong]

Two things I've never considered funny; Stephen Colbert and cold weather.

"[...] the attempt to lure our fellow countrymen to this desolate, subarctic region is, upon humanitarian grounds alone, to be denounced as criminal".
- The Hamburger Nachrichten, on German migration to Canada

Imagine the uproar if the prisoners at Gitmo were sent to Manitoba instead of a tropical island.

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BTW, in 2010 Colbert launched an online campaign to change the definition of “Canada’s History” to that of a deprave sexual act. This after hearing that Winnipeg-based history magazine The Beaver was changing its name to Canada’s History following years of censoring by online porn filters.